“Oh, my God. She’s brought a tree branch into the house. I never get to go outside so I just see them from the screen door. I think it’s a tree. No, it’s got nubby things on it. What are those?
Should I be afraid of this thing? Maybe she wants me to use it as a cat toy. But I don’t do toys. She knows that. I barely do people. Maybe when she leaves the kitchen I’ll take a little nibble. I like green things. I always chew them up and swallow them and then, wouldn’t you know it, I just throw them back up. That’s why she usually doesn’t have green things in the house. Shoot, she’s not leaving. So I guess I’ll have to pretend not to be interested. That’s not hard. I don’t do interested, even on a good day.
It’s not often you walk into a grocery store and see Brussels Sprouts on a stalk. So when I walked into Trader Joe’s today, I just giggled. I have to have that! I felt giddy just carrying it around. I have written before of my love of all stinky vegetables. In fact, I have given you the recipe before that I am about to give you again. I sense everyone didn’t make it.
Noah is coming home from college tonight and I will teach him what Brussels Sprouts look like before they are slathered in butter and bread crumbs. He is also a lover of stinky vegetables and he is bringing a friend home. I will convert him as well. I think of it as a mission.
O.K, here’s what you do. This is more of a procedure than a recipe. You can do this with just a few Brussels Sprouts or a whole stalk, which I am just so proud to possess.
Take off the outer leaves of each sprout. Put them in a microwave container with a little water and nuke them for about three minutes. Let them sit for a few minutes before testing to see if they’re done. They should be just starting to give to pressure. Not rock hard. Not squishy soft. If they’re still rock hard, keep nuking until you get the right consistency.
Now then, melt a copious amount of butter – real butter – in a skillet. Add the juice of one lemon (or half a lemon if you’re not doing a big batch of sprouts).
Meanwhile, cut the sprouts in half through the core. Put the sprouts cut side down in the skillet and let them brown nicely. Browning is one of the keys to this so just be patient and do it. If it looks like the pan is getting dry, add more butter. Once the sprouts are browned and you still have a pretty good amount of butter in there, add a sprinkling of seasoned breadcrumbs – enough to soak up all that butter! Toss and serve. If you don’t become a convert after this, then I just feel sorry for you.