I am sorry to be posting this tonight after a few glasses of wine, but I just had the most lovely almost-exchange with Terrell, who died last year.
I am missing him and I text him on the phone number that he used to have. I don’t know why I think that it will be the Memorial Terrell Number Never To Be Used Again. But I do.
So I text him: “What happens if I send you a message. Will you answer?”
I get an immediate reply. I am thrilled. Maybe this one-world-to-the-next works without a second’s pause? “Who is this?” Signed !LOVED! Decidedly not Terrell.
I text back, thinking I will end this now. “You must have the number of a friend of mine who died. But kind of nice to get an immediate response. Almost like he’s still here.”
She replies: “Who is this 1st of all?”
I reply: “Doesn’t matter. Friend of Terrell’s, whose number you have now.”
LOVED then calls me, wondering why I am messing with her phone. I am caught off guard. I pretend I didn’t text and hang up.
She sends me another text: “Why u txt my phone n ur friend is dead.”
OK. So maybe I am hanging on to the grief a bit too long. I am now finding comfort in texting an unknown woman named !LOVED!, who now obviously has Terrell’s old phone number and is pretty peeved that an unknown person is texting her about a dead friend.
Well, I think Terrell would be very pleased with this. He was good with technology so he would understand why I was texting him at all. He would love that his phone number now belongs to !LOVED! And he would say, “Suguh, get on with it. Life goes on.”
Which I guess I will. Night, Terrell.